Lets Talk Politiks

I was hoping we wouldn't have to....

But we do. Why? Because I found something while cruising through the forest of Bumper Stickers on facebook. If you don't know what Bumper Stickers are, its basically a little thing where you cruise through thousands of pictures of disgusting things that shouldn't be naked together, really bitchy phrases intended to be used maliciously, sexist and racist pictures and remarks, looking to find a picture of adorable small animals with hilariously cute phrases written underneath them, to send to your friends. Well among these piles of terrible things I came across this gem:
Wowza! Take another look at that. The what party? I believe you are missing two letters. "I" and "C". Thats ok, I am missing the same two letters. I'll just call you an _gnorant h__

Where to start with this one!? Ok, first of all, could you maybe come up with something a bit more clever than that? Its hardly even an observation. What does flying have to do with anything? You honestly could have taken any combination of things that come from someplace and had an equally witty insult. Swim and pool for instance. Heres my attempt "If ignorant morons could vote for candidates based on anything but whether or not they seem patriotic and how much they manage to scare you, the United States of America would be a legitimate Democracy!" ROFL! I Know! That one is HILARIOUS! LoLeRskaTez!

Alright. So you call it the "Democrat" party, which I realize may have been a really stoopid attempt at insulting the Democratic party. Honestly, if your calling them names, I suggest the infinitely more insulting "Demo-twats".
Anyhow, you move on to make it seem as though you actually believe the political party is a physical location, stating that it would be an Airport, rather than perhaps a idealistic grouping, such as an airline company. You also assume that anything that flies belongs in an airport. Huh. Interesting logic. I was on a bike ride the other day, and I came across a sign "Bicyles Only". Well, by your logic, if it has wheels its a bicycle, so yes, driving your humvee on the bike path is quite acceptable. Quite acceptable indeed.

Anyhow, I suppose the Democrats could come back by calling the Republican Party the Republic Party, but that just sounds like something from Star Wars, and, as anybody who lived through the eighties will tell you, Republicans love being associated with that movie. (See, Ronald Regan's Crazy Defense Idea. Lazers! WOAH!)

Let me clear something up. Republicans are not dumb and ignorant...provided they are wealthy and powerful. Let me elaborate. Republican policies tend to favor the rich getting richer and maintaining power. To do so, this party hunts for votes among the poor, uninformed classes of society. I see these people as victims, and it deeply saddens me that the Republican, but also the Democratic party, dupes them into false hope and security. Candidates often present themselves as the Common Working Man, when in fact, the presidency is unattainable by all but the aristocrats. But by presenting themselves as such, they generate hope amongst the workers. But this hope is carefully channeled through blind nationalism, and a better tomorrow fades away.

This is why such a little thing such as "If all A-Holes could fly.." boils my blood so much. It attempts to unify the masses against each other rather than having them come together to achieve the common good. The poor stay poor, the dumb remain dumb. Why do poor republicans and poor democrats hate each other? Because they mustn't hate their leaders. Who else will protect them from the other party's agenda?

Anyhow, I'm getting to preachy. I geuss I'll just come out and say it. I'm not a Republican, as you have most likely gathered. Nor am I a Democrat. Think about it. What system does it sound like I favor? One where all are equal and the Proletariat all work together for the common good. Thats right. Fascism.